Cleveland is Rocking Once Again

Clevelanders have had an exciting week. The Browns have been making moves to “win the offseason”, the Indians’ spring training is in full swing, and the Cavs haven’t done anything to embarrass themselves in quite a while.

Let’s start with the biggest news. Browns General Manager, John Dorsey was wheeling and dealing all week. His huge move was acquiring Odell Beckham, Jr. from the New York Giants. Every media member on every show has been praising Dorsey’s ability to swindle the Giants in the deal. I haven’t seen Cleveland rip off New York like that since the Cavs got Iman Shumpert and J.R. Smith from the Knicks for next to nothing.

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Earlier in the week, there was another trade with the Giants that most fans were excited about. The Browns traded their starting guard, Kevin Zeitler, for pass-rusher Olivier Vernon. It was bitter sweet losing Zeitler, but Dorsey and the coaching staff must have faith in last year’s 2nd round draft pick, Austin Corbett. He didn’t get any meaningful reps last season though so nobody knows for sure. I call him Austin “Powers” Corbett because he is an “International Man of Mystery”.

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In other Cleveland news, the Cavaliers have been steadily improving as of late. This is especially true for rookie, Collin Sexton. The young point guard has averaged 27 points per game over his last three contests. Sexton calls himself “Young Bull” which begs the question, should we call this team the Cleveland Calves? This team has found the perfect happy tanking medium. They are playing just well enough to show promise while also staying in the Zion Williamson sweepstakes.

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There isn’t too much to report about with the Indians. Newly acquired 1st baseman Jake Bauers did just had a monster game yesterday with 5 RBI and his brother from another mother, Trevor Bauer struck out 10 batters in less than 5 innings (insert eye emojis). I could drone on and on about Bauer because he seems to improve every offseason.

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So there you have it Cleveland. The city has a team projected to win their 4th consecutive division title, a team that has the third best Vegas odds of winning the AFC, and a team tied with the best odds of winning the NBA lottery.

Everything is coming up Cleveland.

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