The NFL regular season starts in less than two weeks so its about time for official predictions. Here is an interview I had with a very passionate Cleveland sports fan who can only be described as overly optimistic. He is the guy who, in the past, has said things like “Johnny Football is going to tear up the league”, “Romeo Crennel is going to make us the new New England Patriots”, “Dwayne Bowe was a stud in K.C. I can’t believe we got him for so cheap”. Without further ado, here is the interview. (I am the bold print).

---

How do you think the Cleveland Browns will do this season?

Overly Optimistic Browns Fan: I will be completely shocked if the Browns don’t win double digit games this season.

I agree they should be improved but they’ve only won 1 game the last 2 years. Why are you so confident?

O.O.B.F: We have the greatest defense ever assembled. Myles Garrett is an absolute freak. We just shut out the Super Bowl Champions last preseason game!

They do look good but durability is always a concern with some of our top players. Also, the Eagles were playing primarily backups against the Browns first teamers. What do you think about the offense?

O.O.B.F: Jarvis Landry said teams will be lucky to hold us to under 40 points and I think he is absolutely right. We will be drop 50 on most teams.

They only “dropped” 5 on the Eagles last game.

O.O.B.F: Bro, it’s the preseason

OK. What is your take on the Quarterback situation? 

O.O.B.F: It doesn’t even matter. Tyrod and Baker are both absolute studs and with all the weapons around them all they have to do is fling it down field and Gordon and Landry will go get it.

So no concerns about Gordon or Callaway’s documented issues?

O.O.B.F: Did you even watch the Browns in 2012. Flash Gordon is a monster. The guy was great 6 years ago, of course he will be great now. And Callaway already said the gun parts and drugs weren’t even his and he was cleared of the charges for sexual assault and credit card theft. Find a new slant.

Alright. Thats about all the time we have, can I get an official prediction for the 2018 season.

O.O.B.F: If I’m being completely unbiased I would have to say 11-5. I mean, even people in Vegas are betting on us to win the North. Plus, have you seen Hard Knocks?

 

 

The reigning Preseason Champion Cleveland Browns defeated the reigning World Champion Philadelphia Eagles last night by a score of 5-0. As a diehard Browns fan and aspiring big time journalist I stuck around for the entire first half of the contest. I can make all my statements and generalizations based on just 2 quarters of football. That’s what we in the biz call efficiency.

Here are a few things that really stuck out to me after attending (half of) last night’s game.

1. The Defense Looks Good

This one probably seems obvious after seeing the final score, but the first team defense looked very good all half. After giving up a few big runs on the opening drive, the defense really stiffened up. Perhaps the biggest knock on this unit was their lack of turnovers. They did a lot towards changing that perception last night. One thing that stuck out to me more than the turnovers was the excellent open field tackling. There were only a couple instances where a guy whiffed and even then they recovered nicely

2. Myles Garrett. Wow!

I recently attended a Browns training camp with my nephew and the first thing we noticed was how much different Garrett is from his fellow defensive linemen. He just moves different and seems so much more powerful with less effort. That was on display again last night where he was able to pressure Nick Foles relentlessly. The safety obviously comes to mind, but the play that stands out to me the most was when Garrett was able to hurry Foles while being held by the O-lineman. The blatant hold was called and I was just amazed that he got to the QB so effortlessly while a 300lb man was trying to put him in an armbar.

3. Offense Is OK

Obviously 5 points isn’t going to set the World on fire but the first team offense was able to move the ball well on multiple occasions. There was the drive to the 1 yard line, Baker’s possession marched down the field for a field goal and they had a few other possessions where they were able to get a first down or two before punting. If the defense is half as good as Cleveland fans claim then that is about all the Browns will need. Play a game of field position and sprinkle in a few nice drives and we could witness some low scoring Browns victories this season. After the past few seasons, I feel comfortable saying that the Dawg Pound won’t be clamoring for style points if they can just win some games.

The Cleveland Browns have had an impressive 26 first round picks since their return in 1999. What they have done with those 26 picks however, has been far from impressive. I initially wanted to write this piece as a way to rip on all the busts and flubs over the years but I feel that dead horse has been beaten enough. Instead I decided to create a list of 1st rounders based solely on games they started for the Browns. We all know that not all of the disappointments have been due to poor play or skills. Just like all normal NFL teams, Cleveland has had its fair share of injuries, motorcycle accidents, fights with LeBron’s entourage, drug issues, and players literally being stabbed in the back by their fiancees.

With that being said, I was still disappointed to see that only 3 players have ever started more than 80 games for the Orange & Brown. That is the equivalent of 5 seasons. Not exactly setting the bar too high. Those 3, along with their games started, were:

Joe Thomas- 167

Alex Mack- 101

Joe Haden- 81

Since 1999, more men have become the President of the United States than 1st round picks have started 5 seasons worth of games for the Browns.

---

If you go beyond that, there are only 4 other players who started at least 48 games for the Browns. That’s 3 seasons worth for you scoring at home. Those 4 are:

Kamerion Wimbley- 62

Tim Couch- 59

Gerard Warren- 59

Braylon Edwards- 58

What a sad state of affairs when Kamerion Wimbley was arguably the fourth most valuable 1st round draft pick the Browns have made in the last 20 years.

---

On the flip side, Cleveland GM’s have selected 8 players who started fewer than 2 seasons worth of games (32). Thats even after excluding players drafted after 2015. Those 8 were:

Justin Gilbert- 3

Johnny Manziel- 8

Brady Quinn- 12

Barkevious Mingo- 16

Cam Erving- 17

Trent Richardson- 17

Brandon Weeden- 20

William Green- 30

*I feel I could technically include Corey Coleman (18 starts) who was drafted in 2016, but is no longer with the team.

More 1st rounders played fewer than 2 seasons worth of games than guys who played more than 3 years (worth of games). That is absolutely bonkers. Most of these guys started more games in college than with the team who drafted them. Heck, I’ve eaten more Chicken McNuggets since starting this article than most of these guys have games started. Let’s just hope that Dorsey and the Boys have it all figured out now.

Well, well, well another week of Hard Knocks is in the books. As a subscriber to basic cable I am not privy to actually watching HBO so I am creating my review based solely off of what other writers said happened. As someone who is completely ignorant to copyright and plagiarism laws, I will be extra careful to conceal the identities and takes of those I am using.

From what I can gather, week 2 was a snoozefest compared to the action packed season opener. A 6 second clip on twitter was all it took for me to realize how big of a bum Corey Coleman is. Him complaining about being behind Landry, Gordon and Callaway on the depth chart is laughable at best. I’d give Antonio Callaway my credit card information before I gave Corey Coleman a starting gig on this squad.

Speaking of Callaway, the Browns posted a quote from John Dorsey on their website in regard to the WR being caught with weed and gun parts. Dorsey said, “This isn’t college football. This is the National Football League”. Without looking it up, I’d venture to guess that Dorsey attended The U in the 80’s because most people don’t associate guns and multiple drug offenses with “college stuff”… After extensive research (wikipedia) I’ve determined that he went to Connecticut. Basically the same thing.

The final earth shattering headlines were that David Njoku’s gloves created the next Laurel/Yanni debate and 4th string TE Devon Cajuste whistles with his dad. Deep stuff.

Tune in next Wednesday/Thursday-ish to find out what happened on Monday.